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Wednesday, 7 April 2021

Adjusting to my new life

Wednesday 7th April 2021
Life goes on....

Well I picked that image before it snowed yesterday :) but according to the weatherman that artic wind won't be around today, although it's still blinking cold!  Big thick coat and a pair of gloves and Alfie and I still enjoyed our walk. 

It was good to see some of my Owls yesterday, even it was only briefly, that's probably better to be honest as it's getting me back into society a little at a time, I've been without company for so long, i've forgotten how to socialise for sure.  

I had a mom wobble last night though, shed a few tears before bed, I'm not sad if that makes sense, well I guess I am when I think about the pain she suffered and that she's gone, I don't miss that version, but I do miss my mom, I've been missing her for years now.  I think I'm probably hormonal too, oh isn't it wonderful being a middle aged, menopausal mess lol.  Grief is just something you have to experience and it's something you have to do alone, yes friends can be there to listen but eventually I'll come to my own peace in my own time.  It's all a process, I actually get angry that I don't miss her enough because I'm relieved she's gone because of the pain she was in and the pain she was causing me.  Isn't the human brain a crazy mix of chaos!  What I am enjoying is not having to plan anything, not having to be anywhere at any particular time, I love doing what I want, when I want.   I appreciate that will change when I start working again, but for now, it's lovely. 

In other news, I did my first day on track, no photos because I've broken my camera on my phone, it's got to be sent for fixing and yesterday I was reminded quite a few times how much we use them.  I couldn't even barcode scan anything so I went old school in my Be Happy Owls journal I've had printed, now have I got a photo already taken anywhere cos I can't take one, hold on....

I wasn't really hungry in the morning but I made a tasty pasta dish with brocolli, peppers and sardines, I added a Aldi pasta sauce which was delicious and I even left some!  Now I had the sardines because I'm thinking nutrition, it's suggested to eat 2 portions of oily fish a week, so they're one and I like them, salmon could be another or pilchards.  I also like mackeral but it repeats on me, other examples are herrings, tuna (fresh not tinned), anchovies, fish roe, trout and kippers.  Why should we eat oily fish?  There's no better healthy boosting super protein out there!  The human body cannot produce omega-3 fatty acids, which makes these crucial fats an essential part of the diet.  

What do you do with this fish?  Well easiest for me would be pilchards or sardines in tomato sauces on toast.  I adore trout and would enjoy that with potato and veggies or salmon is truly versatile, here's a salmon and noodles recipe for one cooked in the microwave pinched from the BBC website where you'll find lots of other ideas Quick and easy oily fish - BBC Food


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