Monday 17th May 2021
A little progress each day adds up.
I woke up just shy of half four, that's exactly 8 weeks to the hour that mom died, spooky some would say, I'd say coincidence and I'd had a good sleep, I can't believe it's only been 8 weeks though, they've gone quickly but at the same time it seems such a long time ago. I've woke up feeling positive though and ready to get back to losing some weight after winging it for a fortnight or more, I've just weighed myself for the first time since May 5th and I've stayed the same, no shame in a maintain!
Why am I ready to lose weight today you ask? Well it's Monday of course, always a good day to reset, but seriously because I'm in pain, I went to bed last night and everything hurts, I've woke up today and getting out of bed, I looked like Gollum's sister as I recreated the evolution of man as I made my way to the toilet trying to straighten up! Let's see if losing a stone will help lower that pain shall we, no I don't expect to do it by the end of the month but here's to eating more fish, veggies and other such foods. I've already made great progress by removing the crisps, chocolate and other such junk foods from the house, now to work on the other stuff and that does include lowering the alcohol intake as difficult as that is to type! Yep, my tracking is back on, I'm going to use my Be Happy Owls journal and get my act together.
The hard part of the house sort is done, the big clear-out is almost complete, the carpet is being fitted today, the cupboards will be done first weekend of June, shame it's not before as I would like to clear the floors in my bedroom of stuff but hey ho, it'll happen. Alfie quite likes making a bed out of the spare pile of clothes that have no home at the moment. I'm having this constant battle in my head about a 4x4 Kallax Unit, at the moment it's on the landing and I need to decide whether it's going back in that room or not, if I was following my heart, it would not go back in, I'd take it apart to get it downstairs and put it in the summerhouse. Then bring the two smaller ones from the summerhouse back into the house and decide whether they both go in my bedroom or one in each. Yeah I think I've just answered my own dilemma there haven't I.
Food, I had beans on toast yesterday with a little parmesan and it was delicious, what a fab cheap meal, that's going to go on my weekly to eat meal plan. Today I'm going to have some fish in white wine sauce out of the freezer for lunch with mash and veggies for dinner, breakfast is egg and mushrooms on toast as they need using and if I cook them all and there's too many I can have the rest with dinner or in a tin of soup if I have one for lunch. There's 3 meals sorted, I'm not having wine today because of getting up for our first sit down meeting tomorrow, I want to be fresh as a daisy for it. Instead I plan to do some yoga and meditation later in my chill out room once the carpets fitted, this is going to be part of my new routine.
The tv used to be on all the time in this house, not anymore, there's the radio, music or my audiobooks most of the day, until I settle down to relax later in the day, which I also have down to a fine art may I add. I have spent so long 'sitting' with mom over the last few years, but it wasn't at all relaxing or restful, I don't think I realised that until now.
Eat well, move more, get good sleep, be healthy & happy - that's the goal! There's not quick fix, not magic potion, no 'NEW' diet that's going to be 'THE ONE', I've just read an excellent book - Why We Eat (Too Much): The New Science of Appetite by Dr Andrew Jenkinson and if like me you're interested in the science of it all, it's well worth a read, it explains how science has got it wrong in the past, how 'fat' isn't the devil, how sugar isn't great, why we shouldn't follow certain diets like paleo and keto, it's really educational. Then he goes on to tell you how to lose and keep the weight off! I took some interesting bits from it, I will stop using vegetable oil once the bottle I have has gone, but I'm not willing to do all the things he suggests for more than one reason, firstly I like eating all foods and drinking wine and secondly, eating grass fed beef, pork and chicken is beyond expensive, £20 an organic chicken is, £3.80 I pay for mine from Sainsburys. Yes doing everything he suggests may help me lose a few stone and live longer but hell, I'll take the shorter, fatter life which includes the odd takeaway, freezer meal and vino!
We're all adults, let's be realistic about what we want from life, I want an easy, calm, quiet one, I want to sit in my garden in the summer with a glass of something nice having giggles with my mates. I have no desire for nights out on the lash, followed by sweaty gym sessions to burn all the calories I consumed so that I can get a 'thin' body - I did it in my twenties, I'm over it now. I'm happy with my buddha body, I'll be happier with it to be a little nearer to a zen goddess lol but I'll take how I feel over how I look any day of the week, I like me and there's a lot to be said for that, it's good to be liked but if I'm not it's okay, because what other people think of me is none of my business, I'm happy in my world.
On that note, I'm off to make that healthy breakfast, here's to surviving Monday, making it through the week as I enjoy the company of the best kind of people in our huddles - eek exciting times.
Mwah, luv ya
Love me xx
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