Wednesday 11th March
It's not realistic for every day to be a great day.
It might not be realistic for every day to be a great day but it doesn't stop me waking up hoping it will be. I woke up yesterday emotionally exhausted and honestly worried for my mom as her behaviour had been dreadful over the weekend, but instead of focusing on that, I focused on the day ahead, what I could do about the situation and went to work to enjoy my workshops. After going for the blood test (yak to needles) I called Brooklands chasing up the call I'd had 3 weeks ago, got passed around a little but finally talked to someone who said they'd get the lady looking after the case to call me back and YAY she did too, she was lovely and is going to come this morning at 9.30 before her weekly Wednesday meeting with the doctor, so hopefully that will help with mom. She's woken up quite lucid regarding her condition this morning too, so hopefully she'll be open and honest with them about how she's feeling and behaving. Oh and yesterday turned out to be a great day - go figure, mom was loads better than she had been all weekend, her mood was much milder and when I got back from work last night we watched 3 episodes of a programme about the south west coastal path and we really enjoyed it together, it bought back memories of us walking the Pembrokeshire coastal path together, yes she was getting mixed up but I could see she was remembering bits and that was wonderful. She even said, 'is that too far to go for a day trip', that's the first time she's made any mention to wanting to go or do anything in forever. Never assume when you get up that today is going to be as bad as yesterday because then you will make sure it is! Always hope for better - ALWAYS!
I managed a better day food wise, had a couple of slices of toast and a big mug of tea for my breakfast. For lunch I enjoyed this 10SP 💙 goats cheese and onion focaccia, smoked trout, home made chutney and salad was delicious!
I won't lie I did eat half of moms slice of focaccia bread that she left so that was another 4SP (work it though!).
Then for tea, now I'm going to explain how my brain works here for your amusement, because this is why I have excess fat on my body, notice I didn't say why I'm fat, I'm not fat, I have fat! I have skin but I don't describe myself as skin! Anyway, I was feeling lazy about cooking my dinner and I've been fancying a chicken chow mien but it's not easy to just stop on the way home for a takeaway, so I thought ooo I could use Just Eat, it's Tuesday and they offer 20% off some places on a Tuesday, so I went to look at the app. There wasn't a Chinese offering the 20% but my favourite Indian was, so I thought ooo Tandoori chicken wings, but they didn't do wings, but they did do Tandoori chicken, plus other things I like plus you have to spend £15 to get the 20% before I knew it I had £30 odd worth of food in my basket. Then I thought, I should offer to get my sister something after all she is sitting with mom all night so I messaged her and she said NO! Well it was like someone had slapped me across my face, she was my, what's the word I'm looking for, she was going to say yes and justify me ordering this food, but she said no because in her words, 'I'd only be having one for having one's sake', well suddenly I realised I was only having one because it was 20% off, but I wanted a chow mien which would cost £6 so instead here I was about to spend £30 to save £6! Yep, I'm a moron but I was also sulking because thanks to all the MORONS in this country I couldn't get an online food delivery because not only have they bought all the bog rolls they've taken all the delivery slots too, fools, thanks for that, I struggle to get to a shop to get food, my mom must go through a dozen loo rolls a week so if I'm lucky I have a weeks supply.
Anyway, I'm happy to inform you, I didn't order Indian and had a can of WW tomato soup with bread and spread, GO ME. It's all about the small things, the good choices that balance out the not so good ones.
Yeah, loo roll or no loo roll, we've got this, today will be a great day. When you're feeling that you've got a lot of crap going on in your life, listen to others, you'd be amazed to hear their troubles are often worse than yours. I know that doesn't make you feel any better or make yours any less but it is a reminder you're not the only one, I realised this yesterday listening to some of my members, no wonder we're carrying more fat than we'd like. Sometimes it's not just because we purposely eat too much food, often its because we're that busy helping others, doing stuff for everyone else, trying to be here, there and everywhere that we grab what we can when we can. 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 to all of you for even trying to think about healthy eating and weight loss, you're truly amazing.
On that note, mom's calling me to help her get dressed so I'll see some of you later and I'll be back to bore you on my blog tomorrow.
Mwah, luv ya
Oh and have a great day xx