13th December 2014
Hope but never expect, look forward but never wait.
I slept like a blocked up baby thanks to Night Nurse, so I’ve had a good rest at least, and I’m sat here in my bed on my laptop because my pc had gone to the computer doctor to be fixed or laid to rest whichever is necessary! I just can’t cope with the slowness of it any more, I can go make a cuppa whilst I’m waiting for it to work, I’ve had enough of its “not responding” messages, so it’s being looked at. Looking like a new one may be my Christmas pressie to me though.
Once I’d had my conference call at noon yesterday, I turned all the work stuff off and spent the afternoon with my mom, brother and his wife, we’ve not seen them since last Christmas so it was lovely to catch up, they’re coming back Monday for a few days (they’re spending the weekend partying with their friends). It becomes a very noisy house when you get a few Longsden’s together, I have to admit!
Now one thing I have noticed the last few days is there seems to be a lot of self doubt, maybe a little self loathing and a general unhappiness in some when they come to get ready for their Christmas parties because they ‘feel fat’ or similar thoughts because they’re clothes don’t fit. I think sometimes on these occasions we’re suddenly aware of our bodies because we maybe are putting on different clothes to what we’d normally wear and we’re outside our comfort zone. It’s maybe more a self confidence thing, so possibly we start focusing on our body and how it looks rather than admitting to ourselves that we’re a little be overwhelmed by the fact we’re going out with lots of people we may or may not know well.
I can only talk from my experience and I know when I go out with my bestie I don’t even think about how I look half of the time and if I do its only to make sure I don’t look ridiculous and I’m passable. Whereas when I’m doing something that isn’t in my comfort zone like a conference or a big party I would be much likely to have the meltdown, what am I going to wear, I look huge, I’ve gained lots of weight, blah blah blah. I’m not so bad these days because I have learned to see past all that and see the real me who I’ve accepted but those thoughts still trys to rear their ugly head. I know the other week when we did the conference I had a mini panic when I thought to myself “I’ve put so much weight on, everyone will notice, I’m fat blah blah”, luckily I remembered feeling a million dollars at the conference the year before, I’d worn a tartan dress and I felt really confident and good in it. So I checked back at my weigh card and I was only about 3lb different! So I thought to myself what had changed, the thoughts in my head mostly was the true answer, I thought my body has changed shape I reckon, so I tried on the dress that I had worn a year ago and it still fit, it was possibly a bit tighter but not much. So that just shows the power of the mind and you know what even if that dress hadn’t fit me, I’d still lived the last 9 months happy with going out every day dressed in whatever I’d chose for all to see me without stressing over what I looked like and what people would think. That confirmed it wasn’t my body that was the problem it was my mind!
Yes we want to lose weight and get to a size we’re happy with, not a size that others dictate we should be can I add but if whilst we’re on that journey we’re supportive and loving of ourselves we’re more likely to achieve that than if we give ourselves a hard time, stay home feeling bad and inevitably end up overeating because we’re sad.
Life sometimes gets in the way, I believe that and I tell my members that constantly, it doesn’t give us an excuse to just think “sod it” and overeat all the time but it does help to explain why we maybe haven’t done as well as we’d like. And by ‘life’ I mean so many different things for different people, what seems nothing to one person can be a massive deal to another. So don’t ever compare yourself and your journey to another’s, you’re writing different chapters in a different book.
A comment I read on facebook yesterday said, “I'm a stone heavier than I was last Christmas, I've been out more times in the last couple of months than I've been in my life because you know what you only get one shot at this life malarkey and it's for living whatever size you are!” Now the lady who wrote that is BeYOUtiful and it took a near death experience to give her that perspective on life, you don’t need to wait until it’s too late for you to realise you’re just incredible and your friends love you whatever size you are, if they don’t they’re not actually real friends.
The most beautiful curve on a woman is her smile, never forget that!
So let’s all agree to enjoy this holiday season, go out and have fun, be gentle on yourself, eat, drink and be merry when the opportunity arises as long as you’re enjoying it. Don’t eat for the sake of eating because you feel miserable or because its there. This healthy and happy life we strive for is all about balance, it’s important to see your own inner wonderful just as everyone else does. What exactly is this thing called beauty, you've only got to look at couples to see we all see something different in each other, what one finds incredible another would think ‘nah!’ thankfully that’s the way it is otherwise we’d all be after the same. In my opinion what’s on the inside is so much more attractive than anything on the outside, we can wrap ourselves up in pretty clothes, colour our hair, paint our faces but if you’re ugly inside none of that will ever make a difference.
So go to the mirror, look at that BeYOUtiful person looking back at you and say “I love you, you’re everything I need right now at this moment in time and I’m going to take care of you by loving you and taking care of you in a healthy way.”
Have a great day. xx