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Tuesday, 30 April 2019

Find comfort in the chaos

Tuesday 20th April 2019
Your now isn't your forever 

 My plan of action yesterday was to not dwell on the bad stuff, to distract myself and focus on the good things in my life, to appreciate and enjoy the little things that bring me joy and pleasure and it worked.

My day started with Dave picking up all this food for the food bank; 
When he saw the cat food for the rescue place, he joked that I already have enough on my plate but I keep taking more on, I pointed out it's a distraction but also it's because if I see something that bothers me, I like to do something about it.  I love photos, they tell a story and when I saw this one Dave posted later on, it really made me smile, because we're making a difference and I had something to do with that. 

My next distraction was this little pooch, I had to take him to the vets, turns out he has a skin condition like eczema and he needs anti-biotics and special shampoo and I need to wash him twice a week, oh that was so much fun - NOT!  I have to shampoo him twice a week and it needs to be left on for 10 minutes, can I just say 10 minutes is such a long time when you're trapped in a bathroom with a grumpy wet dog.  


After my dentist trip, I went to Sainsbury's to forget to buy the things I needed because I got distracted by other stuff that was much nicer than bleach and shampoo, I'll add them to my online shop!  

I didn't buy this but I do fancy it, 16SP per portion, serves 2, £2.50, it was a big box so definitely a treat meal with a zero breakfast and lunch.  I wonder if it's as good as the box makes it look? 

I fancied coleslaw and checked both of these and they were both 4 Smart Points per 100g, both cost 75 pence too, but the ones twice the size.  Just goes to show things aren't always what they appear.  

I had half hour in the garden with mom whilst she drank her cuppa, then I came in and cooked this which was what I had instead of an Easter egg last weekend, oh my days, just incredie this was, Alfie loved me yesterday can I add, he can be bought. 

 20SP a serving and serves 6 but I didn't have loads, just that on the right, it was my lunch and dinner in my defence, and this was my amazing meal; 

The lamb on the left was for Alfie.  I do love those flatbreads from Sainsbury's for 3SP. 

My final distraction yesterday were these, only another 279 squares to make, it'll be worth it when they're done though, each 4in square is a little triumph and a great distraction from the not so good in my life. 

I'm hoping that cleaning could become a distraction for me too, I gave the upstairs bathroom a good clean Sunday after my bath, hence needing more bleach.

My mission this week is to find something other than food / wine to distract me, Sunday wasn't a good day but I didn't pour a glass of wine at all, that was a little mini victory, here's to many more mini victories.  I've got a fridge full of healthy food, if I need distracting, I'll cook a delicious meal, not grab a handful of instant crap which doesn't even satisfy me really, it's almost like self abuse that distracts me from the abuse I'm getting from the Alzheimers sufferer!  Mmm, that's why I write because sometimes I write something like that last sentence that gives me a realisation, yeah I don't actually like the crap, I'd much rather have proper food, okay that proper food might be incredibly high in Smart Points sometimes like the lamb but at least it's actually filling and satisfying and I couldn't eat it again 3 times over like the junk.  

We all have stuff going on in our lives, we have crap going on, every single one of us has something going on in their lives and we just have to realise we are not alone and remember it can get better. 

Today I once again choose to distract myself from the bad stuff, to celebrate the small victories, to start the day with an attitude of gratitude and focus on the little things that bring me pleasure because bad vibes don't go with my outfit.

Here's to enjoying my day, doing my best and continuing to understand my mom, she can't help who she's becoming.  I read yesterday grief is the price we pay for love, so true. 
Stay BeYOUtiful!   


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