11th April 2017
It's not what we actually do that defines our confidence but how we see ourselves.
Another good day yesterday apart from a good cry at about half eleven! Yep I'm a big believer of using those emotions, if I wasn't supposed to be able to feel happiness, sadness, anger etc, I surely wouldn't have been given the ability to. I'd had an hour finishing the bathroom off, reviving the grout on my tiles, so now my bathroom is whiter than white and I love it, I'd got my massage booked for 12, it's literally a 5 minute drive, so I left about 11.15 because I was going to nip to the fruit farm and get mom a nice cake, first though I had to collect her prescription from the chemist, it wasn't there, now I had to go to the doctors to find out why because she'd run out of the one drug. When I asked and the receptionist checked the doctor hadn't done it because I shouldn't need said drug as she should have plenty. Well to cut a long story short, we disagreed about dosage, he said one a day, she's been having 2 a day for at least two years to my knowledge, either way she still had none. By the time it was sorted I was late for my massage and hadn't been to the fruit farm at all. What a waste of 45 minutes, my life is full enough without my time being stolen by unnecessary stuff. Anyway I got in my car and cried all the way up the road and for a bit longer once I got to my massage lady, she said and listened and empathised - she's good at that, then I was okay again.
By having a cry, I'd relieved my stress, hadn't stuck my head in the fridge for food and felt better afterwards - why would you not chose that option? Being strong isn't just carrying on, being strong is knowing when you need a good cry, then carrying on. I know a lot of my reaction is down to my hormones, the early stages of menopause so I just remind myself of that, also when I'm having a down day I remember that I was okay an hour ago and my life was good yesterday, it helps to not let my emotions get out of hand and the mood continue.
Yeah it is good to smile often, think positively, give thanks, laugh loudly, love others and dream big but it's also okay to be sad, have a good cry and think how occasionally things suck.
I didn't let my mood affect my food though, I did make the fruit farm for moms cake, I say a bottle of rhubarb gin that took my fancy but I didn't buy it as if I did, I'd drink it! Drinking that wouldn't be helping me with the healthy, maybe the happy - but not the healthy right now.
My bathroom looks great with the clean grouting, I'm having a couple of little cupboards made to fit in the gaps each side of the sink, then all the lotions and potions can be hidden out of the way and it'll be clear, clean and bright. Even mom's commented on how much she loves they stairs being clear, need to keep it up, doing a bit at a time. I think I'm going to tackle painting my bedroom this weekend as I'm having wardrobes fitted next weekend and hopefully my bed will arrive something soon after, it does say up to 8 weeks, it's only a week tomorrow.
I had a lovely chicken dinner yesterday, forgot how nice carrot, swede and mash is, really tasty, for breakfast I'd had eggs on toast with tomatoes and mushrooms. For my tea I had a small slice of quiche and some Waldorf salad, it has to be one of my favourite salads, I really do need to make my own lower fat version, using low fat mayo, it's basically, celery, apple, walnuts and sultanas in mayo I think, could change the sultanas for grapes, that'd bring the points down, and the mayo for plain yogurt and lemon juice or use low fat mayo. Maybe I'll buy the ingredients in my next shopping.
Today though, I've got a fridge full of food to chose from, busy Weight Watcher day ahead so I'll opt for something quick to cook, starting with eggs of course, I'll have the rest of the tin of tomatoes with them too.
Have I mentioned that I've made my bed every morning since I sorted my room out, I hadn't made my bed in a morning possibly ever, so this tidying up is good for my soul, did you realise they reckon it's good for you too, it improves your life! Oh yeah, apparently according to various websites;
A made bed creates the appearance of a tidy and pulled-together bedroom.
So what? Well, here's what: It's a small thing, in a way, but also not so small, because coming home to a tidy bedroom will make you feel a whole bunch of positive things including proud, calm, in-control, and grown-up.
It gives you a feeling of accomplishment.
It creates a positive state of mind as you go to bed.
Make your bed, lower your stress.
It prevents embarrassment.
It leads to other good habits.
So go make your bed BeYOUtiful and I'll catch ya tomorrow ;)