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Thursday, 7 November 2019

If not now, then when?

Thursday 7th November 2019
it's all fun and games until your jeans don't fit.

Did I have a perfect day yesterday?  Did I heck, deciding I need to sort myself out wasn't like flicking a magic switch that changed everything in my life and my mental state, erm nope.  Did I do better, I sure did, even though I did have WW Rosemary & Sea Salt bakes and a WW chocolate protein bar.  Did I track 100%?  Yeah I did!  Was it within my daily allowance?  Nah course not, one step at a time!  Did I eat my 5 a day? I sure did, I made my own mushroom soup so that had mushrooms and onions in it, then I had 2 satsumas and a banana, with my dinner I had cabbage and carrots and with my tea I had tomatoes.  Not bad if I do say so myself, I also contemplated whether I needed or wanted the food before having it, I still had some of the want but not all, it's progress and that's what matters. 

My emotional wellbeing is good right now, I'm getting used to the shift in mom, I'm really practising gratitude at the moment, being thankful for the life I have even with it's struggles, it's seriously helping my mental health.  Don't get me wrong, no one has the right to tell you that their life is harder than yours.  No one has the right to invalidate your struggles because they 'got through it okay'.  no one has the right to tell you to suck it up because other people have it much worse!  Hardships are not comparable, everyones struggles are real, legitimate, and just as difficult as anyone else's.  Having said that for me at the moment, thinking about others and the problems they have is helping me to see mine through different eyes, to approach it with a stronger state of mind.  Yes mom has Alzheimer's but there are people out there coping with other stuff and surviving so I can do it too.  The book I'm listening to is helping that, plus we watched the Pride of Britain yesterday and that helped to put things into perspective too.  Things could be a whole lot worse (oh that's not a request or a challenge by the way if the universe is listening!)

Right back to food, my safe zone lol, I had my faggots, turns out I'm not so keen on them anymore, so Alfie ended up eating half of mine off my plate, plus another two out the tray and the fox was very grateful for the other two, at least they're out my system though.  I made some mushroom soup, no recipe just the chestnut mushroom that needed eating, a diced onion, bit of garlic and chicken stock, looks gross, tastes good.  Then for my tea I had 2 eggs on 2 slices of Warburton 400g wholemeal bread with some roasted cherry tomatoes.  

Now today I have a chicken breast with a pastry top from Penn Road butchers, they're quite high in points but so good and if I have it with butternut squash that's a zero hero so will balance it out.  I've got some mash and cabbage left so could do bubble and squeak with a pork chop maybe.  Now I have choices, the truth is I could eat both one for lunch, one for tea, but that might work out way too many points, we shall see, at the minute I'm working on not wasting any food and eating healthy, I can get the points down to my allowance a little at a time, need to get my appetite back in check first by eating good foods and getting rid of the snacking stuff that I didn't used to do.  I'll have a zero breakfast to save my points, omelette it is then, that's portable too, so if I idon'thave time to sit and eat it, I can take it with me.  Wonder if I could be bothered to roast some butternut squash this morning to go in the omelette, nah I won't will I lol, partly because it might spoil it. 

I hope your still focusing on yourself, your health and your happiness, I'm feeling blessed to be surrounded by wonderful people, today I'm grateful for my sister for helping me with mom and playing tag on my work days, I'm grateful for my helpers who make it possible for me to run my workshops and I'm super grateful for my member who continue to support me by attending my workshops without them I'd be unemployed.  There are so many other reasons for me to be grateful and instead of focusing on 'It's hard' I'm choosing to focus on 'it's easier because of....', that's helping me at the moment. 

Let's have a healthy day xx Mwah, 

luv you 

Love me xx

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