5-7th March 2011

If you are lonely when you are alone, you are in bad company. Jean-Paul Sartre

As I type I’m on my own in a cottage just outside Evesham, no phone signal, no internet connection, no conversation and its bliss for me, so apologies for no emails this weekend. I’m watching a black bird and a chaffinch eating a slice of bread I put out earlier, I’ve just had a bath that lasted 75 minutes and have finished a book which I started reading yesterday. I can’t think of a better way I could have spent this weekend after the busy year I’ve had so far. Initially I was spending the weekend with a very dear friend, I was going to cook for her and we were going to drink wine and watch dvd’s – unfortunately she’s very poorly and couldn’t make it, so I came alone to recharge my batteries.

I love my own company and haven’t done a weekend away on my own for at least a year maybe two, I’d forgotten how much I need it and I’m going to make sure I do it regularly and have to say may choose this cottage again, the bath is huge, it’s warm, quiet and the beds comfy – what more can you ask for!

I would definitely recommend the book I’ve just read, it’s called “Hector and the search for happiness” by Francois Lelord, a very easy read but really insightful, a modern day fable. I’m going to share with you his list of lessons because by doing so I don’t think it spoils the book at all, or should I share one of them a day so you can concentrate on each one for a day, mmm I like that idea, if I give you a list of 21 things you’ll read them and forget, maybe by giving them to you one at a time you may actually think about them!

So lesson number one: Making comparisons can spoil your happiness.

Is this relevant to losing weight, absolutely because very often we lose a pound but we’re not happy with it because our friend or the women in front of us has lost 2lb!

Anywho this book made me feel really good because I realised I am happy and one paragraph that I nodded a lot at was;

“He also said to himself that even if he died now, he’d already lived a good life: he’d had a nice mother and father, many very good friends, he’d fallen deeply in love more than once, had chosen a profession he loved, had been on some wonderful trips, had often felt he was helping people, and had never suffered any terrible misfortune. His life was a lot better than the lives of most people on the planet.”

I’m smiling now because I can agree with all of that. The next thing this book reminded me was we do learn a lot through imitation, so if we watch our family and friends overeating, we’re more likely to do it ourselves, this is the paragraph that made me realise that; “And Agnes went on talking, because it was a subject that was very important to her. She was even doing a study on it. she would show small children a film of a man hitting a dog then leave them to play together and compare the number of times they hit each other (not very hard thankfully because they were only little). And, well, they hit each other noticeably more after they’d seen the film than before. Because, Agnes explained children learn a lot through imitation, they’re made that way, and that’s why if your mummy and daddy are kind you’ll be kind.”

Mmm interesting, not only should we be setting a better example, but I believe we’re never too old to learn! We just need to start doing things differently.

There’s much more to this book than those few paragraphs and if you’re not sure if you’re happy or what happiness really is then maybe you should go buy it, its £4 on Amazon.

The last bit I’ll share with you for now are the words of an old Chinese monk in the book, he said, “True wisdom would be the ability to live without the scenery, to be the same person even at the bottom of a well. But that, it has to be said, is not so easy.”

I’m happy with my life, I’m happy in my job and I happy in my own company – are you? These day’s I’m also happy with my weight – whatever it may be, because I’ve realised it doesn’t make me who I am, at the same time, I’m happier when I’m feeding myself good food and taking care of myself! What makes you happy?

That’s all a bit deep for you to read on a Monday, but, start as you mean to go on I say, focused, thoughtful and happy xx