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Tuesday, 2 November 2010

2nd November 2010 todays facebook email

An excuse is worse than a lie, for an excuse is a lie, guarded. Alexander Pope

I receive lots of emails from various subscriptions, too many to list, but one I had last week made me think about my relationship with the Weight Watchers Points System, this was the content of that email;

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How to Know When Things are Over Between Friends.

Everything with a beginning has an end; friendships are no exception. Whether through death or by choice, the human bonds we share are not forever.

In last week’s “Ask Davey” post, Nardo90 asked:

When is an appropriate time to admit things are over between best friends?

My experience has been that people grow, change and evolve over time. Sometimes we change in ways that are complimentary with each other – and sometimes we change in ways that push us apart. I don’t think this is a bad thing; in the same way that some people are allergic to shellfish or peanuts, some of us can be allergic to a given relationship.

It’s great to love and honor every human person – but we need not be everyone’s best friend.

When I was in high school, I became good friends with a girl in the town next to me. We even went to one of her proms together. We had a lot of fun, but when we went on to university, we temporarily grew apart. Years later, we reconnected. As often happens, time had changed both of us – and it was obvious to me that this wasn’t the most fulfilling relationship for me to be experiencing. Painful as it was, I expressed this to her and we parted ways. Maybe we’ll reconnect down the road – I don’t know.

All of us deserve to be in relationships that are healthy and fulfilling. When a relationship becomes toxic, you owe it to yourself to cease participating in it. Just as breaking up with a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife is difficult, so too is it difficult to break up with friends. But the difficulty is no justification for being a part of something that isn’t lifting your life up.

The measure of a friendship isn’t how long it lasts – it’s about the laughs, experiences and good times that you shared. Nothing can discount that or take it away. And sometimes the best way to honor a relationship is to know when it’s time to say “Goodbye.”

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I think the article in itself is brilliant advice in a non-diet way, we’ve all had those friends we no longer have anything in common with, or that we’ve just grown apart. And sad as it may sound, over the years the Weight Watchers Points Plan has become almost like a friend to me, someone who’s there everyday or every meal ;-) and it’s been hard for me to let go of it. As you probably already know or have guessed I’ve been following Weight Watchers new plan for just over a month and OMG was it difficult to leave behind my points. I’m so used to checking the calories and saturated fat on everything that I was still doing it, heck I can work points out without the aid of a calculator, I knew it so well, I was so used to those points.

Having now made the changeover, I’ve realised I had started to take the Points Plan for granted (a little like friendships), I thought I knew everything and didn’t have to think anymore, I’d become set it my ways, learnt how to take advantage of the system and get away with it without doing my diet too much damage. Unfortunately because of this, the points system started to let me down or did I let it down? It wasn’t the system that was flawed it was me!

So with this new plan, I’m having to give it more attention, to be more accurate, to actually check what I’m doing and to put myself first. And it’s great, I’m feeling fantastic, I’m almost back at goal and I’m enjoying it. So it’s almost time for you to get yourself a new ‘none-human’ best friend, and next week you can join me on Weight Watchers fabulous new plan.

Remember life starts now? (And it’ll get even better next week xx)
Are you living yet?

You’re not alive unless you’re living!

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