Can you just do this for me?

21st January 2016

Make yourself a priority once in a while.  It's not selfish - it's self-care! 

Can you  ......?

Now there's the start of a sentence we hear often, people are always asking us to do things, can you do this for me, can you take me...., can you, can you, can you!  And usually if you're anything like me, even when you don't have time, or you don't want to do it, your head is screaming NOOOOOOO, you open your mouth and saying, "yeah", then for the rest of the day you're thinking, 'damn, I haven't got the time or I didn't really want to do it.

The only time we're happy to say no is when we're already doing something for someone else, so the easiest reply for us is;

"I'm so sorry I can't I have to do ....... for ......?

BOOM!  We had a get out of jail card and we don't need to feel bad because we're already doing something for someone else.  Whoop Whoop, off the hook. 

How often would you respond with "I I can't I'm afraid, I have up do ....... for myself then, so I don't have the time".  NEVER!

If you do, I just bowed before you a little as I take my hat off to you.  Even if I do manage to say no, I still feel bad afterwards because I think I should've done it.

Why do we find it so hard to put our needs first?  Why is self-care such a challenge?  Is it because we believe our time could be put to better use tending to other concerns.

I do take care of myself but still neglect my needs in favour of helping others at times, which is why I'm making a conscious effort to prioritise myself and my own needs.  Already we're only 3 weeks into the year and I'm having to remind myself that's what I'm doing because already I've found myself working when I should be relaxing, getting back to members at 9pm when I should be winding down to go to bed, answering queries on a Sunday when I should be having family time.  Yeah I'm guilty of putting others needs ahead of my own. 

Every morning I sort my mom, I make her breakfast in bed, I sort her medication, I would not dream of leaving this house without doing that, but I forget my own medication, I've been known to skip my own breakfast - what's that all about!  Most of tend to take care of others’ needs before we take care of our own – which means we may never get around to doing things for ourselves. 

We probably do this the name of unselfishness – but my experience has shown this to be misguided.  It’s not selfish to set aside time to take care of yourself.

Taking good care of yourself can be the kindest thing you can do for the people around you.  When you take good care of your own mind and body, you’re in a much better mood, nicer to be around and a hell of a lot more productive.   I know the people I work with and my mom would definitely rather have a chilled happy version of Bev than a cranky one.

So my self-care plan is a work in progress, and one of the main things I'm working on is a "do it daily" list which I'm committing to do every single day to keep me happy and healthy

Here’s my list:

1. Wake up early to meditate for 20 minutes.
2. Drink a pint of water first thing before having a cup of tea.
3. Eat protein for breakfast.
4. Take my medication.
5. Find something to smile about.
6. Stop to make a midday meal.
7. Go to bed at a reasonable hour.
8. Hit a minimum of 5,000 steps (I've only just added this one and because I've realised I'm struggling to hit 10k on my days off and I don't want to pressure myself any more, I'm changing it to 5k)

What is or would be on your list, what are the healthy habits you do daily to take care of yourself?

Remember BeYOUtiful, self care isn't selfish, it's necessary!

Here's a very simple Smart Point meal idea, I can't call it a recipe as it calls for a jar of sauce, but it's a really quick, tasty meal, I haven't had it myself for a long time, but I might need to now I've seen it.

Chicken Tonight

Serves 4, 9sp per serving or serves 3, 11sp per serving

Losing weight doesn't mean you have to eat 'diet' food, nor miss out on eating with the family. It can be inexpensive, easy and fit in with your life.
This is one of my favourite easy meals, I make it when the Chicken Tonight sauce is on offer!
Chicken Tonight, low fat honey & mustard & mash.

1 jar Chicken Tonight, low fat honey & mustard sauce (19sp)
450g diced chicken breast (4sp)
450g Potatoes (cook & mashed) (11sp)

Follow instructions on jar & serve with mash potatoes
I also usually add a couple of diced carrots (one of my five a day!)
and I'll also add more vegetables if I'm really hungry.