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Disclaimer
Beverley has prepared the content of Bev's World irresponsibly and carelessly. She therefore disclaims all warranties, express or implied, as to the accuracy, originality or completeness of the drivel presented on this blog or on other linked websites or on any subsequent links. She vehemently denies that the information may be relied upon for any reason. Beverley shall not be liable for inflicting laughter, shame, disgust, torrents of tears and the eventual desiccation or crashing boredom on readers.

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Tuesday 16 August 2011

Are you living in the real world?

16th August 2011

It's not the size of a man but the size of his heart that matters.  Evander Holyfield
The birds were singing, the sun was shining, it was a perfect day. Mrs Perfect jumped out of bed and went downstairs where her perfect children were quietly eating breakfast which they had prepared for themselves. After a few moments, Mr Perfect washed the dishes and took the kids to school in their clean uniforms which he himself had washed and pressed the previous night. Mrs Perfect left for work shortly afterwards. It took 10 minutes in the car, along tree-lined streets with almost no traffic. When she arrived she found a six-figure bonus paycheck on her desk. After working for 30 minutes, she left for two hours of free treatments at the company beauty parlour. After a light lunch she took a phone call from Mr Perfect who told her how much he adored her. Then she did another 30 minutes work before leaving for three hours of leisurely golf. At 5pm, her driver drove her home as usual. The children had cooked a meal for themselves, walked the dog and cleaned the house from top to bottom. They insisted that she have a relaxing bath before she left for a romantic dinner with Mr Perfect. At midnight, Mr and Mrs Perfect returned home. Later, as she lay next to her handsome devoted husband, Mrs Perfect sighed with pure pleasure.

Okay, that's enough fantasy for one day!  If you’re not up for a reality check this morning – maybe don’t read on. xx

The truth is, the sun never shines when we want it to, children don't leave warm beds unless they are threatened with instant death, husbands need intensive re-training therapy before they do anything constructive in the house, streets are jammed with rush-hour traffic, very few honest people receive six-figure bonus paychecks, no one works 60-minute days, children are more likely to set fire to the house than clean it and there's no such person as Mr Perfect.

So what's this got to do with losing weight?  Answer: everything.

For example, let me introduce you to Mary. 

Mary Lives in Fantasyland

Mary is starting a new diet. She's 202 pounds and would love to get down to 150.  Unfortunately this won't be possible.  You see, each time she tries to lose weight, the wheels come off her diet. 
Because something knocks her sideways. Usually within 3 weeks. 

Either, she binges at a friend's barbecue, or she binges at home while watching TV in the evening, or something makes her feel totally stressed out and she turns to food for comfort, or she blows it all at her favourite restaurant.

Whatever the immediate cause, the result is always the same. Mary quits her diet, feels like Mrs Total-Failure, and gains even more weight.

And each time she promises herself: "Next time is gonna be different."

Dream on baby!

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What is Mary's Problem?

The trouble with Mary is that she lives in fantasyland. She thinks that Life isn't going to throw her any surprises. And when it does, she wobbles and falls over.  She needs to get real.  She needs to realize that life is ALWAYS gonna throw her surprises. So she needs a Plan B. She needs to anticipate problems and be prepared.   Because there ain't NEVER gonna be a time when life is calm and stress-free. Not now, not next week, not ever.

Now meet Sandy.

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Sandy Lives in the Real World

Sandy weighs the same as Mary, and has the same "weaknesses." But she has no intention of waiting for Fate to wave its magic wand and make dieting a hassle-free experience.

So before she even starts a diet she thinks of all the things that might go wrong, and has a Plan B for most of them.

1. Eating With Friends and Neighbours

Sandy loves going to events, school fetes, neighbourhood get togethers and lots of other events where food is brought and eaten. But since she wants to lose weight she accepts she has to change her habits and resort to Plan B. So instead of taking along her favourite high-calorie foods she takes along delicious salads and other low-calorie dishes. Amazingly, her foods prove more popular than the more fattening stuff.

2. Eating Out in Restaurants

Sandy eats out quite often with her partner, or friends. It's one of her favourite things. But since she wants to lose weight she accepts she has to change her habits and resort to Plan B. She usually thinks: "this is a treat, so I'm going to have what I like." But now she says to herself: "I'm not gonna spend the next 10 years dieting, so I'm gonna choose yummy food that won't end up on my neck or thighs." It takes her a month to adjust, but after that it's no problem.

3. Using Food to Cope With Boredom or Stress

Like most women, Sandy has developed the habit of turning to food whenever she feels bored or stressed. But since she wants to lose weight she accepts she has to change her habits and resort to Plan B. So she makes a friend at her Weight Watcher meeting, Sally, who also wants to lose weight, and makes an agreement. If either of them needs instant relief from boredom or stress, they will contact the other and have a chat or meet up to go for a 30 minute walk. This arrangement works so well, it develops into a regular 30 minute walk every night. During these walks, one of their favourite topics of conversation is "how much food they would normally have eaten!"

These are just three of Sandy's Plan B's. None of them are rocket science.  But notice how each is based on Sandy's realisation that her normal habits need changing.

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If Not Now, When?

After reading through this, you may think "I'm not ready for this." That's absolutely fine. But if not now, when will you be ready? When will you feel secure enough to change your habits?

Will you be ready in 5 weeks? Or 5 months? Or 5 years?   Or when the time comes, will you find another excuse for delaying things further?

Think about it.

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You Can. You Can. You Can.

An important step is to face the truth that you can do anything you want.

I spend most of my time motivating people to look inside themselves for the answers to their weight concerns.  Because we are all truly amazing creatures. YOU women give birth, care for your children and families, you organise your homes, most of you hold down jobs, you may study, and a thousand other things, oh and if you’re a bloke I’m sure you do a lot too ;D

If we can do all these things - if we can solve all these problems - YOU can certainly take care of a little old weight problem.

So stop kidding yourself and face the truth.  You can do it. You really can.

But don't wait for ever.

THE BOTTOM LINE (for a great bottom)

1. Don't live in fantasyland. Instead, get real and prepare your Plan B.
2. Plan B requires you to change.
3. You may not understand men, but you can solve a weight problem.

Not in the mood? No problem. Grab a biscuit and relax.


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