Meh!

Tuesday 2nd September 2021

Better an oops, than a what if?

I've been awake since 4am, boo, but I've still managed almost 7 hours sleep so it's not the end of the world, it is blooming cold though, I'm sat here in my dressing gown for the first time in a very, long time.

I've just measured the milk I put in my tea, I did it yesterday too because I know my mugs are big and I like strong tea but then I add a lot of milk, well 84ml to be exact which is 28 calories as I use UHT skimmed milk, that's more than nutracheck put for a mug of tea which is 19 calories.  Now let's get real here, I didn't lose weight this week, I actually gained a pound and a half but I very much doubt one or two mugs of tea each morning is the reason I gained!  

No it's more likely to be because I'm not tracking correctly and I'm eating/drinking too much!  I ain't gonna lie, I was disappointed, I didn't expect a gain at all, especially as I've been doing my workouts every day, but as they say, you can't outrun a bad diet!  MEH! 

So because I gained weight and didn't expect it, guess what I did yesterday, I drew a line and started a fresh, I had eggs on toast no spread for breakfast, and tandoori fish with pilau rice and peas for lunch, I tracked it on my app and in my journal.......

Then I ruined it by having a chip butty and chicken wings, oh and too much wine!  I obviously wasn't over the gain!  I didn't track them, I was going to pretend it didn't even happen.  I'd struggled to do my workout at lunchtime after I walked Alfie, everything hurt yesterday so I was feeling sorry for myself.  Looking back I'm realising the nasty voices in my head that try to sabotage things were saying stuff like, 'see you can't exercise, you body can't cope', 'I don't know why you're bothering, it won't last', 'you may as well give up now, cos you're not gonna keep this up at all!'.

MEH!  I even woke up at 4am, really thirsty, feeling a bit icky and that voice was there again, 'so you were gonna sort it out in September and you didn't even survive day 1, you're hopeless you are, do you know that, Elle's on day 19 of tracking or something like that and you couldn't manage a day!'

I tell you something for nothing, I don't like that bloody voice much, so I've muted it as I'm typing and realising what's going on. 

Now here's a bit of knowledge for you, are you ready for a bit of learning?

There's a term out there used by psychologists "Learned Helplessness", it's a condition in which a person suffers from a sense of powerlessness arising from a persistent failure to succeed.

Most 'dieters' have experienced feelings of helplessness at some point in their journey, and chances are, you probably have or maybe are there now.  You know how it goes, you've tried every diet going, and every time, you've successfully lost some weight. But a few weeks/months/years later, you find yourself in the same position again, having regained all the weight you've lost (and then some). So now, you've learned that no matter how you lose weight, you're never ever ever going to be able to lose weight long term.

Sound familiar?  Or at least that's what we've told ourselves…

Well balls to that I say!  I'm not having it, yeah I know that we are guilty or taken what we learn in a situation, seeing it as "truth" and using it to predict the future. But hell no!  The real truth is that most of these aren't truths, and we're generalising.  

Instead of predicting the future, how about we create it!  We can change, people do it all the time, this is why we're writing our own story this time, designing our own plan!

Instead of this 'learned helplessness' these psychologists talk about, we're going to use something else they discuss, which is to be 'industrious' oh yeah, now that sounds way better and I'm already feeling more awake and ready to take on the day, ready to do my 30 minute workout to the best of my ability, because I'm not going to be an athlete overnight, it isn't going to be easy to get my fitness levels up to where they were in the past.  Hell, I'm never going to get them to where they were when I was 25 because I'm not 25, I'm 51, so I need to stop thinking about what my body was like then and start to think about how it can be as a 51 year old!

What's this 'be industrious' all about then you ask?  Or not, but I'm gonna tell you anyways, just like you can learn to be helpless, you can learn to be industrious, this is a condition in which a person persists at a problem as a result of previous reinforcement of persistence at difficult problems.

Basically, if you learn that you're able to accomplish something with hard work, you're more likely to work hard at a similar task because you feel as though you'll be able to accomplish that too. Eisenberger introduced this theory a few decades ago, but it holds true today.   Okay, nearly finished with the clever stuff, stick with me, just an example to show you which might make it more understandable:

When you started your weight loss journey, your calorie budget seemed low and you thought you'd never be able to stick to them, but you did and you lost weight, next you might have even started thinking about what foods you were choosing and started to make better food choices.  That's you learning to be industrious. Every day, you're doing it, same with me and my exercise, when I started I didn't think I'd be able to do one half hour workout let alone do it daily but today makes it day 21!

Let's believe in ourselves a little bit more, I'm saying that as if you're all the same as me, maybe you're not, maybe I'm the only one who's doing a bit crap, but I doubt I am.

Today, I'm going to do better, I've just stopped typing long enough to go in the kitchen and scan and track everything I consumed yesterday on my app, it's not a pretty figure but I've tracked it 100% honestly, oh and those damn Almonds have also gone now.

I have an healthy shop coming tonight from Sainsbury's so I can have a salad tomorrow, there's a butternut squash on the side in the kitchen that I'll slice up today and have some as fries for lunch with something healthy from the freezer.  I forgot to do overnight oats and I've just realised I forgot to add a flavoured yogurt to my shop but that's not the end of the world I have natural yogurt and I can have Weetabix for my breakfast this morning.   

Here's to a good day, you in? 

Mwah, luv ya 

Love me xx