10th
May 2014
It’s
not that some people have willpower and some don’t, it’s that some people are
ready to change and others are not. James Gordon.
Mmm
Willpower, it’s almost a mystical magic word isn’t it, that has such a great
deal of influence over people
You
know how it feels when you get up on a morning and for some reason you’re
absolutely bursting with energy and raring to go, so you get absolutely loads
done that day, then towards the end of the day you are absolutely shattered,
all your energy has been spent and you are ready for your bed, that’s normal because
we have to recharge our batteries to get a fresh dose of energy back after a
good night’s sleep.
Willpower
is similar, it doesn’t last, it has to be recharged and that’s where we fail
sometimes, for example we leave our meeting feeling all motivated and ready to
have a fantastic week, on track, in the zone because we know we really want to
lose weight and we’re feeling that we can do this because we have a whole group
of people behind up.
That’s
Tuesday say, then Friday you walk in the house after a hectic week, you are
shattered and you’ve still got to make everyone’s tea before you can sit down
and relax, you’re little un walks in with a bag of chocolate buttons and offers
you one, you say “no thanks I’m on track this week, I plan to lose weight”,
then your eldest walks in the kitchen with a pile of washing, “can you get me
this cleaned for tomorrow mom, I’m going out”.
As he goes to put the washing down he knocks the carton of milk all over
the floor and that’s the last one, so now you have a mess everywhere and you’re
going to have to go to the shops before you can have a cup of tea. There’s an open packet of biscuits on the side
that your other half’s just opened because he’s as thin as a rake and can eat anything
he wants, you look at them, glare and him and think to yourself, “it’s just not
fair!” You start moaning about the state
of the house, the fact you’ve just finished a 40 hour week, there’s no milk and
no dinner ready, when that wonderful man you married suggests he go get the
milk and picks up a takeaway tea so you can go sit down and rest.
Your
willpower kicks in?
Does
it heck! You’re tired, you’re drained,
you’re hungry and you have a kitchen that’s full of washing – how many of you
are saying, “no love, I need a weight loss next week so I’ll start on the tea,
will egg and chips do, I’ll have a WW ready meal?”
Willpower
smillpower – wateva!
We
give ourselves too hard a time when we say, “I failed, I’m just not strong
enough, I don’t have the willpower!”
That’s not really the whole story is it – life is so busy and full that
willpower gets overtaken by tiredness, busyness and all the other things that
make ‘staying strong’ difficult.
So
what do we do?
Well
first of all ACKNOWLEDGE this happens; stop expecting yourself to be Wonder
Woman or Super Man, with ultimate willpower and motivation powers!
There
are lots of names for willpower: determination, drive, resolve,
self-discipline, self-control. All of
which can disappear in the wink of an eye on a Friday night if you’re not
prepared.
According
to most psychological scientists, willpower can be defined as:
- The ability to delay gratification, resisting short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals.
- The capacity to override an unwanted thought, feeling or impulse.
- The ability to employ a “cool” cognitive system of behaviour rather than a “hot” emotional system.
- Conscious, effortful regulation of the self by the self.
- A limited resource capable of being depleted.
And
there is lots of research on it if you’re interested, however I’m going to
share just one of my thoughts on the subject, I’ve never met anyone (yep NEVER)
who has the willpower to stay motivated 100% of the time to succeed at losing
weight and keeping it off. Not with just the use of willpower anyways,
saying no becomes difficult at certain times, I think we all realise that!
So
what’s the solution? Personally I think preparation
and planning will get you much further than relying on your willpower.
If you’d
walked in on Friday night to that situation above and everything had happened
exactly the same except before you left the house on the morning, you’d spend
10 minutes throwing some chopped veggies and chicken portions and a packet mix
in the slow cooker, the outcome of that incident could’ve been so
different! You could have resisted the
offer of a takeaway because you had dinner sorted, actually your other half may
not have even offered because he knew there was a dinner cooked.
You
may think yeah maybe but I had to have the willpower to get up and put the slow
cooker on, true but being ‘strong and motivated is much easier first thing in
the morning when you’ve had a night of rest than it is at night when you get
home shattered!
It’s
like when you go shopping, resisting temptation is easier if you’re not hungry,
shop on an empty stomach and well we all know where that leads.
So
if you feel you lack motivation make your new best friend organisation!
If
you feel your willpower is waning, use paper power, plan your week, start to get
to know yourself, work out your behaviours and how you react in difficult
situations, when are you strong when does your strength dissolve, what can you
do to ensure you’re not put in situations you can’t handle?
I’ll
stop writing now, you get the point and I hate to go onto 3 pages on the pc, I’d
stop reading so I’d expect you to!
Planpower
is way better than Willpower! Yeah if
superpowers are being handed out, I’d forgo invisibility for the ability to be
organised and prepared for any situation (that’s just confirmed I am officially
middleaged and I don’t care!)
If
there’s nothing to send me off track in my kitchen cupboards, it’s easier to
stay on track, that’s preparation not motivation!
Have
a great day BeYOUtiful, raining here so I’m gonna do a bit of housework and
then chill out with my mom, enjoy whatever you do.
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