26th August 2014
I am learning to allow the space between where I am and
where I want to be inspire me and not terrify me. Tracee Ellis Ross
Yesterday was looooooong….. I think it’s something about
August Bank Holiday Monday because it’s the same every year and it’s even
longer when you add a day of rain to it, it’s still raining now – what’s that all
about!
When a day’s long and there’s nothing on television and you
just haven’t really got the enthusiasm to do anything else a place we often end
up is the kitchen looking for something to do in the way of eating. That was me yesterday, I did try to battle
with that mood though, instead I put the other half of the beef in the slow
cooker following a tesco recipe – I didn’t like it when it was eventually
cooked, the beef was done to perfection but the wine sauce was yak – wine shouldn’t
be used in a sauce like that I don’t think, it wasn’t pleasant. I made a lovely soup though using potato,
celery and onion in a chicken stock, that was my saving grace I had a bowl of
that and it took the edge off. This is
why Filling & Healthy works so well because when you just want to “EAT”
whether through hunger, boredom or just because, with F&H you can and
because it’s good food, it fills you up where as if you did it with biscuits
and crisps you could carry on eating for ages.
My day started great with a nice cooked breakfast, WW bacon,
egg, mushrooms, tomato and one slice of bread, then for lunch we had Quesadilla filled with spinach, pepper, spring onion, tomato,
mushroom & cheese, served with griddled courgette.
These could easily become a new favourite food! I must have been stuck for something to do because
I even spent a few minutes bagging up low fat cheese into 1pp grated quantities
ready for use later in the week.
I even started to read yet another book on ‘emotional eating’,
I didn’t continue, they can’t tell me much I haven’t already read to be fair
and I knew exactly why I wanted to eat yesterday, 1) didn’t really have the motivation
to do anything else, 2) food tastes fantastic 3) it would’ve passed a few
minutes 4) I’d just started a new 12 week food journal and my sub-conscious
gremlin was hell bent on making it a rubbish first day entry, 5) it was peeing
down of rain and we were stuck in the house making me and mom a bit cranky and
Alfie a living nightmare. Ooo I guess I
could go on but I won’t. I guess the
real question is why didn’t I just think “sod it” yet again? 1) because I’m fed up with myself for
overdoing the ‘sod it’ syndrome this year, 2) realising from all the ice bucket
challenges that we really do all need to start taking our health and our weights
seriously, we can cover most of our bodies up with good clothing but throw a
bucket of water over yourself and everything shows, 3) Because I’d made a
decision that I will do 7 days 100% on track, no excuses and I will fill in
that 12 week journal with good or bad tracking, the choice is mine and finally 4)
because I’d smiled at a Facebook friends posts and it’d made me realise I’m
just as bad (she’d done 3 posts over the
morning, the first a lovely photo of bread she’d just baked to go with the
second post which was a full English and lastly a post saying “Just squeezed into my jeans. oh I need to diet!!!! tomorrow I
start properly. today we are out with friends.” Who recognises themselves there?
I have to say had she not done those
posts, I could’ve possibly gone off track but reading it like that one after
another even though they were posted hours apart made me realise it’s what we
all do over the course of a day, we battle with ourselves. Our moods take up from “YAY I’m gonna do this”
to “Oh I need food” to “ooo that looks delicious, maybe just a bit”. And it’s constant isn’t it, which is why it
is so difficult, so don’t ever give yourself a hard time over it. Food is just so readily available and it is
difficult to resist, and even knowing that we eat emotionally and knowing our
reasons doesn’t make much difference when in that moment you’ve seen it and you
want it, or you’re angry/bored/depressed whatever emotion and food is there to
offer you a small amount of comfort.
I don’t know the long term solution
by the way, I know a few tricks that work for me, I’ve watched others do it
too, I don’t know many who manage to do it all the time continually. What I do know is that by giving myself a
break, accepting my behaviour then deciding to change it by doing what I can
when I can has helped me keep the majority of my weight off and also give me
the motivation to ensure I don’t gain any more, it’s not just about a size on a
label or a number on the scales, it’s about how I feel inside and that is what
stopped me yesterday, I realised I loved myself so much I want to live as long
as possible, part of ensuring that happens is watching what I eat so I don’t
end up with avoidable health problems.
I don’t want to be ‘overweight’ that
was the thought I kept reminding myself of and it is why I left the kitchen and
finished on track even if I didn’t eat the food I’d originally planned thanks
to a recipe fail.
Here’s to another day of rain by the
looks, hey ho, I’m seeing it as a great opportunity to enjoy soups and stews,
if we’re going to have Autumn in August we may as well embrace it.
Focus on the healthy and happy
BeYOUtiful, get excited about getting healthy, remember good healthy food can
be delicious too!
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