I didn't like them numbers...

31st March 2015

Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we'll ever do.  Brene Brown

It was a gain yesterday, an ouch kind of gain 2.5lb on!  Now my card has a circle on it, hey ho, I've given my head a wobble and had a word and I'm back on it.  I didn't track over the weekend and I knew I was overeating, especially as I'd used my weeklies already.  I won't lie though I didn't expect that big a gain, but hopefully it's jelly fat and if I get back on it straight away, I'll get it off before it sets! 

So why did I gain, why couldn't I continue those fab first two weeks that I'd had, well this is what makes continual long term weight loss success difficult because NOT doing it is much easier than DOING IT, much like anything really.  If your norm is to enjoy eating and drinking then not doing those things takes control and control isn't something we always seem to have.  We can always find an explanation for our behaviour, some may call them excuses, others reasons, it doesn't matter what you label them, they exist!  For me last week they included, being ill, being tired and being hormonal then to top it all off my dog was poorly (he seems ok now thankfully).  Because I was ill and unable to just rest, I didn't have the energy to go and do a healthy shop nor stand in the kitchen and cook healthy foods, a quick sarnie was doing the job.  Because I was tired and needed more energy, I wanted to eat more to get some energy.  Because I was feeling sorry for myself and hormonal, I went into sod it mode, all be it a pretty controlled version I have to say which is why I was so surprised at how high the gain was, but I'm okay with it, I've made my peace with my card!

Oh I did make chocolate cupcakes again from the Weight Watchers April magazine and instead of chocolate drops I used chopped up WW toffee bars and WW cookie bars, they went down a storm in my meeting, I have to say!  I only had one, so all in control again.  Great recipe for 3pp, and the 80g of dark chocolate drops (11pp) can be replaced by 4 Weight Watcher bars of your choice, nice!

Now my meetings closed next Monday because of the Bank Holiday and I'm covering a meeting on the night so I need to try and find a way of getting to a meeting although the nearest if it's open is Rowley Regis!  A motorway journey on a Bank Holiday Monday, mmm we shall see!  Or I could do a Sunday one in Dudley maybe, but I've covered that meeting so not sure.

Anyway, I will stay on track and see how I go, I could get weighed on a night meeting for one week I guess, I need that group support, it's too easy to think sod it and stay away, then before you know it, you're back to square one or worse.  Nope not this time, Weight Watchers works because of that group support and I'm getting back to goal!

But first to make it through this week, I don't like it when they move those clocks, I've been up since 5am, but let's be honest my body thinks it's still 4am, so it'll take a week to adjust to that too, plus I'm still trying to get back all the sleep I didn't get over the weekend and last week, I likes my sleep I do!

I've just realised I need a shopping list, a basic weekly list to ensure I buy the things I need to have success at the scales!  Then maybe I need to work out some low ProPoints meals so that again I have a list of suggestions to chose from.  I need to go back to basics, I really do, I've done this so long, I've forgotten it all and I need to remind myself.

Just as March is being blown out at 100mph out there, I plan to let my bad choices to be blown away too, here's to making April amazing, we can do this! 

Have a great day.

Suns out, let's have a great day...

30th March 2015

Just remember, even your worst days only have 24 hours.

Well yesterday wasn't the best day and it certainly wasn't how I'd planned to spend my Sunday, that's 3 rubbish weekends on the trot!  Mom was poorly first, then me and yesterday poor Alfie,  he'd cried and whined all night so I hadn't had any sleep at all.  We ended up at the emergency vets in Stafford where he gave him a couple of injections, antibiotics and anti-inflammatories.  We got back home hoping he'd sleep the rest of the day but instead the crying and whining and throwing himself round the floor lasted all day!  He finally, thankfully slept, so we have had a decent night's sleep and I feel human again.

Alfie being ill on its own doesn't sound that bad really does it, it's not like he's the only dog that's ever been poorly, but if you add into it the equation I don't really function well without sleep, oh and not forgetting as soon as we're out of the 'norm' mom gets more confused than usual and I have to keep re-explaining what's the matter with him and why he's crying, it really doesn't make for a pleasant day.  By the time we did go to bed, mom believed it was yesterday that Alfie had been to the vets and then five minutes later she was saying "he's been doing this all day, this whining - don't know what the matter is with him, is he trying to find one of his toys"  Well you get a little glimpse of one 5 minute segment of yesterday so needless to say, I did my best to see it for what it was and laugh, taking my mind off it all with my jigsaw, hence today's quote :)!  (This paragraph will be omitted when I print my blog out for my mom to read, she doesn't need to be reminded of how she behaves, we do our best to ignore it.)

And have you guessed yet!  I didn't stay on track this weekend, I wasn't ridiculously off track but I'm not within my allowance, so I will go face the music, draw a line and re-start my fresh week this morning.  I have a fridge full of healthy foods ready for the week.  On a positive I didn't bake or make desserts so we didn't spend the day eating those!  Also because Alfie was so poorly and he showed an interest in the duck on my pancakes that we were having for dinner, he got the majority of that too, so my 13pp dinner was probably nearly 8.  Always a bright side ay :)

As you know I love my quotes, and I noticed this one this morning which has got me to thinking;

Find three hobbies you love: One to make you money, one to keep you in shape and one to be creative.

I love this idea, obviously I love nutrition, food and helping people so I've found the perfect job to make me money, walking has always been a hobby I enjoy and that does keep you in shape, I just need the sunshine to do it more (yep I'm a fair weather walker), I love messing in the garden too, so both excellent ways to keep in shape and both can be done for longer lengths of time than gym sessions and running so work better in my opinion.  Finally one to be creative, this is easy, I enjoy cooking and photography and I love getting creative on the pc and again thanks to my job I'm getting to do more of the graphics side of it again, just enough to keep me occupied without being too much to cope with. I also enjoy having a dabble in other hobbies when I'm in the mood like scrapbooking and card making, so yeah I'm almost filling that criterea, just need to move more for sure.  It's mostly down to time that I don't do as much as I should but on a day like this, it's much more appealing.

Right I'm off, gotta go and face the music, hoping Alfie won't need to go back to the vets today, but if he does, we'll work round it.

Have a great day, drawn that line if you need to, focus on the positives, just work on improving not perfecting. xx

Oooo pudding!

29th March 2015

Energy is contagious, positive and negative alike.  Be forever mindful of what and who you allow into your space!

I'd say I've woke up feeling as though I'm getting better, my lurgy is exiting the building, but I'm not sure I've actually been to sleep, Alfie has cried most of the night so there's something not right with him, if he doesn't improve we'll go to see the vets. 

It looks like it's gonna be a wet grizzly day so I'm going to spend it in the kitchen, getting creative, we've had some great ideas in the meetings this week for desserts and I know my mom likes a pudding for sure!

One idea I read online which I liked was Rich Toffee Popcorn.

Use 10g popping corn & 1 rich toffee bar.  Melt the bar in microwave for 40 seconds with a dash of coconut milk to thin it slightly.  Pop the corn in a pan and then mix together.  4pp. 

The ingredients I had in my meeting other than the Weight Watcher chocolate bars were, 

Anchor light squirty cream, 1pp per 15g

Ice cream flakes, 1pp each

Wafers 2 for 1pp

Cornets 1pp each

Mini marshmallows, 1pp per 15g

Chocolate dessert cups, 2pp each

Large flan case - 18pp

Medium flan case - 9pp

Small individual flan cases - 2pp

Pastry base - 29pp

Angel delight Strawberry, sugar free, 10pp made up as directed for the entire packet, or 9pp if using skimmed milk.  Sainsbury's basic version 8pp

Sponge fingers - 2 for 1pp

Meringue nests, 1pp each

Mini meringue nests, 2 for 1pp

Weight Watcher cream, 1pp per perving

Sainsbury's tinned basics custard - 8pp per can

Sainsbury's packet basics custard - 8pp per sachet

Sugar free jelly - 0pp per serving.

If you get imaginative you can make some awesome puddings, and let's be honest whether it's a 4pp pudding or a 24pp one, they don't take much longer to eat!

Loved the idea of a mini flan case for 2pp, sugar free orange jelly 0pp, and 2tsp Sweet Freedom Choco Shot Liquid Chocolate 1pp, that'd be like a giant jaffa cake!

What about a smashed up meringue next with a Weight Watcher pudding yogurt and some fruit, eaten mess style dessert.  Seriously get your thinking cap on you'll be amazed at what you can put together.

And when you think that this tempting looking Ferrero Rocher will set you back 21pp 

and look what's inside, this is all you get for that 21pp, how long's that taking to demolish!

I'm sorry, that would have to be some special kind of magic chocolate to want me to spend 21pp on it when I'm trying to get slimmer for summer.

Here's to a lovely Sunday or mom and me time, hope you've got a fun one planned too.

I must be pretty amazing!

28th March 2015

Make sure your worst enemy is not living between your own two ears.

Yay, I have a voice again, it may not be my usual one but it's getting there and I'm starting to feel better for sure.  Yesterday I decided to go hunt down a coat I'd seen a member wearing on Thursday and luckily I got the last one in the shop, so now I have a pale blue coat for summer to wear over the jeans I managed to get back on yesterday, yes losing that 8lb means I'm back in them and able to manage wearing them, a few more pounds will mean I don't have to undo them after a meal!

I may not be ending my week within my ProPoints allowance but I'm still in control, I will be sticking to my 26pp today and tomorrow and taking whatever the scales have to say on Monday.  I've not been well and I've done my best to resist temptation.

I posted this video on Facebook in the week, I do love a Dove advert and the way they promote positive body image, this video shows that we are often our harshest critics, I'd guess men can be just as harsh with the self talk as women, it'd be interesting to write down those negative thoughts you catch yourself having!  Then to contemplate saying those things out loud to another person, can you imagine their reaction and others around listening to them!  That's what this video shows, it's in French but there are subtitles so if you haven't seen it watch it, only 2 minutes long, it's a very empowering way to start your day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tM2Z0-zFcw

Now to stop with the negative self talk because it can really affect how you feel about your body, you might have to fake it at first and work on paying yourself compliments if you don't feel that good about yourself but stick with it and be consistent, quiet the negative nasty voice in your head and replace it with a more friendly, compliment paying one.  Keep it up and eventually you won't need to fake it!

I used to have negative thoughts about my legs being fat and my big bum but now I love those solid strong legs that have taken me up many a mountain, and my shapely bum looks fab in jeans! 

Turn a negative into a positive, you can do the same!  When you look in the mirror, where are your eyes immediately drawn to?  Do they go directly to the bit you love whilst thinking a positive thought about yourself or the bit you wish you could change followed by a negative thought about how awful it looks! 

Most people apparently look at their body as if it's something that needs improving or 'fixing', we immediately look at the flaws and focus on them.

It's time to stop doing that I say, let's break this negative habit of berating ourselves and insulting our bodies! 

Let's replace the negatives thoughts (I'm not giving you examples, there's enough negativity out there already) with positive ones like beautiful, powerful, strong, gorgeous, elegant, feelings of can and will!  

Let's get positive folks, if you don't feel your being genuine with those positive thoughts, fake it till you make it.  Every time you catch yourself starting to have a negative thought about your body, stop and turn it around replace it with a positive, pay yourself compliments, even if you don't feel great about yourself right now. 

You are amazing, stick with this idea, be consistent and in time you'll realise it.  I mean look at me, I'm awesome, I couldn't have wrote that 20 years ago, I'd have struggled to write it 10 years ago, I may have written it but I probably would have been writing it tongue in cheek!  These days I look at my positives, there are a lot of them, I'm aware of any negative traits I have but they don't define me, they're not WHO I am.

I realised I must be pretty amazing because I know so many incredible and fabulous people who too are amazing and they like me, so they must be right.  I bet you know some pretty incredible and fabulous people too don't you?  You know what that means.... yeah...... you're amazing too!

Have a great day BeYOUtiful, I'm going too!