You have the power!

6^th March 2012

Reality is totally different from fiction. In fiction, things need to make sense.  Paulo Coelho

Well I need to get with it, I’ve been up half hour so far and not even started, so if I hope to walk Alfie I need to get a wriggle on, I think 3 days in Rome has turned me into a lazy Italian wannabee!

When I saw the quote above yesterday I nodded, because reality really can be total nonsense can’t it, and very unfair at times as it was yesterday to one of my very dear friends.  And it can be very difficult to stay positive and focused and realistic at such times.

I’ve just seen my little book of lifes rules on my desk and picked it up, if you read my blog a few weeks ago you’ll remember one of those rules is “You will be presented with Lessons”, well some of those lessons suck, that’s what I say not the book.  The book says, “you are enrolled in a full-time informal school called ‘life’.  Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons.  You may like the lessons or hate them, but you have designed them as part of your curriculum.  Mmm I still say they suck!

It goes on to say we are each here to learn our own meaning of life and will be presented with numerous lessons along the way which are specific to us.  Learning these lessons is the key to discovering and fulfilling the meaning and relevance of your own life.  Mmm I bet my mate, if she’s reading this doesn’t want her latest lesson for sure!

As you travel through your life, you may experience very challenging lessons that others don’t have to face, while others spend years struggling with challenges that you don’t need.  It’s important not to compare your path to others, you can’t have someone else’s life and hopefully you don’t want anyone’s but your own.

As you strive to discover and learn about yourself, you will most likely encounter the basic lessons of openness, choice, fairness and grace.  That’s what the book says anyway, I’m just going to look at choice and fairness because I think we sometimes feel we don’t have a choice and that things are just not fair.

Choice is the exploration of desire and then the selection of action.  There are no neutral actions, even the smallest gesture has a direction to it.  Although used synonymously, choice and decision are not the same thing – decisions are made in your mind, whereas choices are made in your gut.  Decisions come from the rational, reasonable, weighing of the circumstances; choices come from your essences and an attunement with your higher self.  It’s always important to realise you always have a choice.

As for fairness, life is not, in fact, fair, and you may indeed have a more difficult life path than others around you, deserved or not.  Everyone’s circumstances are unique, and everyone needs to handle theirs differently.  If you want to move toward serenity you have to move away from thinking, “it’s not fair”.  If you’re focusing of the unfairness of circumstances, you’re comparing yourself to others rather than appreciating your own uniqueness.

When you consider the hardships of life – the disappointments, hurts, losses, illnesses, all the tragedies you may suffer and shift your perception to see them as opportunities for learning and growth, you become empowered.  You can take charge of your life and rise to its challenges, instead of feeling defeated, victimised, or cast adrift. 

I’m reading a book by Marc Wood called Personal Best who was diagnosed with cancer as a teenager, had his leg amputated and went on to win four Paralympic gold medals, after the initial shock, he took back his power and achieved his personal best – so can you.

Whatever your personal circumstances are at the moment, remember you always have a choice, don’t let anyone take away your power. 

And keep a sense of humour, that’s always helpful, the health benefits, both mental and physical are well documented.  A good laugh can diffuse tension, relieve stress, and release endorphins into your system, which act as a natural mood enhancer.  Much more beneficial than eating a doughnut!

So give yourself permission to laugh – you’ll be amazed at how quickly a crisis can turn into a comedy when you invite in humour.

And remember there’s always someone worse off as this quote implies;

“I cried because I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet” (Author unknown)