Tough night...

Sunday 17th November 2019
We tend to forget baby steps still move us forward 

Skip this paragraph if you don't want to read about Alzheimers and the evil that it causes.
I'm going to need some time this morning to recover from the Aggressive, Angry Alzheimers I experienced in the night from mom, that's the worst I've seen (no violence thankfully) and I'm sad to say I didn't handle it the best.  I've only wrote that so I could get it out of my head process it and hopefully let it go.  Unless you've experienced this cruel disease first hand you just cannot understand it at all.  She'd been great in the day time, my nieces had visited and she'd chatted lovely to them, she'd danced along to the new M&S advert, I'd even video'd her doing it.  But what woke up in the night, verbally attacking me for not being there for her and not caring, well I don't know who she was or what she'd been dreaming to bring that on, unfortunately I was in a deep sleep myself when she woke me up and I shouted back initially.   But sitting on the toilet whilst someone is screaming in your face is an experience I've never had and hopefully never will have again, the look of, well hate on her face will take a while to get out of my head.  Analysing it in the cold light of day (well it's still dark but you know what I mean) I think it was because she was talking to the girls about dad and that's probably been the subject of her dreams or the cause anyway, he wasn't the best husband!

Okay, let's move on to better things, a week of wonderful workshops, bringing everyone up to speed on the new MyWW plan, green, blue and purple plans, I've loved how everyone is happy about them, of course we'd all like wine, crisps and chocolate to be zero but this is the next best thing I guess!

Which plan have I chosen are you wondering?  Well, if I'm honest I'm not being great at any of them right now but this is what's happened since I found out about the changes.  Firstly I was all, 'ooo Purple, it has to be, I love spuds, I can have brown rice and wholewheat pasta, I'll have a dabble at that, still get myself some dailies too, unfortunately I went on a potato party, there's something about a zero carb that makes me see it as a challenge and see how many I can get away with eating!  I decided right now Purple isn't for me.  Then I moved onto Green but I was resentful of having to point my eggs and peas, go figure!  This made me realise I actually love Blue, I always have, I love chicken, eggs, fish and peas so I went back to Blue.  I can see advantages in all of them and maybe at some point I'll try them again but right now, Blue at least encourages me to eat healthy and matches my eating personality.  That could change of course, my heads not exactly been in the weight loss game for the last month, it's been a difficult transition time for mom and her Alzheimers so I'm just trying not to overeat, probably failing at it, but trying.  Although having said that, I've not gained over this month, the bit I did gain, I lost so I'm thankful for that.

I bought this yesterday because it was reduced and I've fancied a takeaway for ages, it was 21SP of I won't buy it again!  It needed a lot more chicken in it for a start, oh and there was all of a handful of rice, that section on the pic doesn't even go to the bottle of the tray, it has a slope in it, so there's hardly any in.  Just makes you appreciate why a Chinese takeaway is so high in Smart Points though, because in a takeaway you'd get 4 or 5 times the size of those portions easily, that photo on the lid is hilarious, there were no CHUNKS of chicken to be seen, there was little pieces and not a lot of them. I still want a sweet and sour chicken dish now though, might make my own.

Here's a low pointed option

Sweet and Sour Chicken Green = 8SP Blue = 6SP, Purple = 2SP

Prep time:10 min Cook time:17 min Serves:4 Difficulty: Easy

A delicious and healthy version of this takeaway favourite.

5spray(s) Calorie controlled cooking spray

1 medium Onion(s), peeled and sliced

160g Brown Rice, dry, long grain (15sp)

500g Chicken breast, skinless, raw (4 x 125g breasts) (8sp)

2 medium Carrots, raw, peeled and thinly sliced in sticks

225g Pineapple, can, chunks in natural juice (2sp for the juice)

2 tablespoons Tomato Purèe (1 sp)

3 tablespoons Vinegar, All Types, malt

1 tablespoons Muscovado Sugar (4sp)

2 tablespoons Soy Sauce, dark (1sp)

Instructions

Spray a frying pan with the low-fat cooking spray, add the onion and cook, stirring for 5 minutes over a medium heat, until softened. 

Meanwhile cook the rice according to pack instructions, drain and rinse in hot water.

Cut the chicken into bite size chunks and add to the pan. 

Cook, stirring occasionally for 5 minutes until golden on all sides.

Add the carrots, pineapple and juice, tomato puree, vinegar, sugar and soy sauce, bring to the boil, reduce the heat and simmer for 5 minutes until the chicken is tender. Serve immediately with the rice.

Or use a jar of Uncle Ben's no added sugar sweet & sour sauce for 5SP, every 60g portion of dried rice is 6SP on green and blue, chicken breast is zero on blue and purple, make your own quickly, use cooked chicken and microwave rice and it's even quicker, I do fancy a sweet and sour sauce now.  

Or maybe a chow mein!  Here's another recipe 

Chicken Chow Mein

Serves 4, Green = 8SP Blue = 7SP, Purple = 7SP or 2SP if you use wholewheat spaghetti or soba noodles (100% buckwheat) 

150g (5oz) cooked chicken (cut into thin strips) (2SP) or more if you want, it's zero if it's breast on blue & purple
1 tbsp veg oil  (4SP)
¼ tsp white pepper
¼ tsp chopped garlic
240g dried egg noodles (22SP) (use wholewheat spaghetti or soba noodles on purple for zero)
Bean sprouts (1 handful) 
½ small onion (sliced)
½ tsp salt  
1 tbsp dark soy sauce (1SP)
1 tsp light soy sauce  
1 tsp sesame oil (1SP)

Cook noodles by soaking in boiling water for 5-10 minutes or until soft to touch. Clean wok, heat wok until hot and slightly smoky. Add 1 tablespoon oil. Add the chicken and onions and stir-fry for 30 seconds. Turn to low heat and add the garlic and stir-fry for another 15 seconds.  

Now add the bean sprouts and noodles. Stir-fry for 4-5 minutes or until the noodles are soft. Add the salt, dark soy sauce and light soy sauce.

Stir-fry for another minute. Finally add the pepper and sesame oil and stir in.

Yeah I really do need to get my cooking mojo back because ready meals do not do it for me at all, although I don't mind a jar of sauce to add my own meat too, that's a great compromise.  I still need to shop lol, I'll get round to it, I'll have the lamb for my dinner, so that's today sorted.

I'm feeling better now I've sat and distracted myself for a bit, for the first time ever I'm hoping she doesn't remember what happened in the night but I know she will ;( hey ho, let's go try and make today better.  

Hope you have a good day xx Mwah, luv ya

Love me xx