Twice in one day - that's a first! For blogging anyway :)

2^nd November 2017

If you’re not doing what you love, you’re wasting your time.

I just posted my blog in my group and wrote “Morning Owls, how you doing? What do you really want? That's a question I've been trying to answer for weeks now and you know what - I still don't know! Do you?”  Then I came straight back to my pc and started typing the following, I needed to get it out.

What do you really want? That's a question I've been trying to answer for weeks now and you know what - I still don't know!   I’m not just talking about my weight, I mean in life.  Up until a few months ago, I was tootling along just dandy, okay my life wasn’t perfect but I was okay with it, then I had my success review at work and things started to change and I was taken along with it.

At first I was encouraged to go for a mentor assessment centre being told that I could bank the talent for when I wanted to use it.  I left that assessment centre buzzing I won’t lie, it had been a challenge, taken me out of my comfort zone and I felt I’d done good which is something everyone wants to do.  Suddenly I’m being offered the Mentor Champ role, not mentor and no mention of banking my talent for the future.  I was flattered as you can imagine and as I’d been told that it could mostly be done from home it seemed a great solution to having something to challenge me without messing with mom’s routine. 

Then I was told my manager was moving areas and they were recruiting, as you can imagine this process is never quick and I started to do more to help out, you know where this is going don’t you.  Two months in and I realised I was doing too much, I already run 12 meetings which I love and I was now doing more than the six hours, my manager was more than okay when I said that had to stop.  Sadly, I’m now realising the 6 hours, mostly from home – aren’t realistically mostly from home.  I was out the house 6 hours on Monday when I went to Leominster, even though I enjoyed it, I didn’t get back till after nine and I’ve got to do that for another couple of weeks, then I need to help other coaches in their meetings, I also have to help the manager by taking notes at other meetings, so the last few days I’ve been realising I might have taken on more than I can chew and I have a decision to make.  See the difference with my meetings is not only do I love them, but we have a routine, I’m never out the house for more than a few hours at a time, never more than 3 miles away from home and moms used to that.   Those 12 meetings are going to become 13 in January too as my manager wants me to split Saturday morning into two meetings, it’s all adding to my workload and I need to remember I must have a life too.  Sunday reminded me of that, I’ve never enjoyed four hours out of the house so much I don’t think, it was so needed. 

I’m one of those people who just keeps going, throw it at me, I’ll get it done but you know what, that’s not living – that’s surviving!  For an assessment centre day last month, I had to do a presentation including the importance of health and wellbeing policies in the workplace and this last month has actually given me personal proof.  Weight Watchers provide an Employee Assistance Programme, a 24 hours helpline to support employees through any of life’s issues or problems.  I’ve sat looking at the card on my desk for a few days now, whilst I’ve been processing it all and contemplated calling.  I don’t think I need to now as writing this blog has helped me get things straight in my head. 

I’m a big believer in everything happens for a reason, an opportunity was presented to me in August and I was flattered, it was sold to me well and it was a fantastic chance for the right person, for a brief moment I thought that person was me, I got caught up in it all.   I’ve now remembered the reasons why I became a Weight Watchers coach and I’m glad I am, the fact that it fits in with how my life is right now is even better.  I’m surrounded by love and understanding. 

None of this is remotely important to you reading this I guess but maybe it’ll make you question what you want from your life.  There is no right or wrong way to live your life, you don’t have to want a career, be a parent, or whatever it is other people are doing.  This is your life – what do you want to do with it?  What do you want to look life, what do you want to weigh – don’t listen to others, pay attention to charts, or believe everything that everybody tells you!  Listen to yourself, hear your thoughts, look in the mirror, love and accept yourself for who you are and who you want to be – there is no right or wrong. 

Time to have a conversation with my manager I thinks....