Sunday, 4 August 2013

Do you think like I do! The things my mind thinks!

4th August 2013
Don’t settle, don’t give up, don’t quit, don’t complain, and don’t stop working towards what you want in life! Just keep working.
 
Having fun in the Maize Maze at Essington Farm


 
 
I thought I’d let you see what goes on inside the mind of this particular Weight Watcher leader who knows she needs to get back on track so that she’s leading by example, however she already loves the skin she's in and is a little hormonal and pre-menstrual this week.

So here are some of the thoughts that went through my mind yesterday; 

So I wake on Saturday morning thinking I really need to reign myself in and get back on track, last night was fab but I'm a leader, I have to talk the talk and walk the walk!  I'll do my best today but there's a fridge full of stuff that my guests didn't eat and it cost me a pretty penny plus it's delicious so I am not wasting it!  No way Jose!

So I take Lynne her breakfast she has toast and butter!  Wow that sounds delicious, I haven't had white bread and butter for ages; I'll have the same!  Mmm very nice until half hour later I have heartburn – not so nice!

We cheated & took a short cut in the maze, you can't do that successfully with weight loss!
 
Jen and I go to Essington fruit farm and spent half and hour laughing in the maize maze and a couple of hours picking fruit and veggies which was lots of fun. We then meet Lynne in McDonalds and I have a happy meal (cheeseburger 8pp, small fries 6pp, sweet & sour sauce 1pp, milk 3pp) justified as okay because A) I haven't had a MacDonalds in ages nor a takeaway come to that and B) I usually have Big Mac meal which is 26pp!  Makes sense in my head!

I finish Jens doughnut too - only about an inch so justify that with "well I resisted having a whole one!" 

I got back home and was still hungry, let’s be honest there’s absolutely nothing ‘HAPPY’ about a happy meal, I find some leftover Parma ham so eat that, justification - it's protein so will fill me up and it's got to be eaten so I can start fresh tomorrow with an emptier fridge!

Then I see clotted cream scones on the side ooo I likes the look of them, I pull a corner off, eat it, then another bit, I eat about a quarter of it, that’s enough to satisfy my curiosity and mom eats the rest for me.

I go for my massage at 2pm which is brilliant and totally chills me out, yet processes my thoughts whilst clearing my mind (that's when the idea for this honest blog came into my mind). It was also where I ate two chocolate éclair sweets and one lemon boiled sweet because they were on the counter and they're nice, not forgetting free!

Got home about 4ish and find mom in the garden so I join her, mmm suns shining again, maybe a can of lager in the sunshine, what's this - leftover crackers from last night, I'll just have one, hold on how did that fridge door open, oh salami, I'll share that with Alfie!

I resist something at last, mom offers me one of her Weetabix breakfast biscuits and I say no thank you, yay am I coming out the other side of the "feed me" phase, oh I do hope so!

It's not even 6pm, the worst 4 hours regarding eating are still to come, I've got to make tea yet!  I'm thinking salad - but we all know it might contain lettuce, cucumber and tomato but its also likely to have coleslaw, ricotta stuffed peppers and whatever else needs getting rid of before the tracker comes out tomorrow. I've just got to get mom to eat the rest of those damn crackers or at least hide them so I can't find them!

I've got chicken marinating in a Weight Watcher sticky chicken bag, that had been the plan for Saturday lunch, it was getting me back in the zone but I've convinced myself it will taste better if left to marinade overnight!  That way I can eat all the leftover "picnic food" today and wake up with a clearer idea of focused! 

Who am I kidding ay?  I have these conversations with myself in my head quite regularly and I'm sure as hell I'm not the only person who has them. Why do we do it?

Well that's the million dollar question isn't it?

I do it because I really do love food, I really enjoy different flavours, I also get great pleasure from the fact I can now afford to buy these foods. I'd rather spend £40 in Sainsbury's on posh grub than on a night out - it's a personal thing. 

I also do it because deep down I know when I REALLY want to lose weight, I can do it, once I am in the zone, I'm 100% focused and nothing sways me, although I haven't been there for a good 14 months.  I believe I'll continue to do it whilst my weight has stabilised, if it starts to go up, then the brakes go on!  But I also know that today's Sunday and I will be more sensible, I won't overdo it and I will track 100% honestly because you can only take the Micky for so long before it bites you on the bum and your jeans don't fit!  I know my limits, I would however like to work towards making bringing that gap a little bit closer together so that my weight comes down a few pounds so I won’t be dithering at the deli counter for the foreseeable future, I will be focusing on the filling & healthy and I shall be starting a new journal and tracking properly because I’ve just realised it’s only 20 weeks until Christmas and I have a holiday with my bestie to prepare for ;-)
Have a fabulous day today everyone, I woke up thinking it was Monday, so I was absolutely delighted to realise it was Sunday, therefore I plan to doubly enjoy it. xx
Eat Gorgeous and track.

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