25th January 2013
People are like oceans, some parts are visible BUT most you
can’t see, shallow pools of truth and deep pools of dark mysteries.
Mmm diets don’t they cause a lot of feeling, everyone has opinion
on what works, what doesn’t, which is best, whether its worth the money, what
the word diet actually means, how a diet works.
Yes they really do cause controversy, I read lots about them
and discuss the subject even more with other people (obviously in my line of
work) somewhere yesterday I read that diets apparently teach you to feel guilty
if you don’t stick to the rules! NO they
don’t ONLY YOU can make yourself feel guilty!
This person spoke of the ‘perfect dieter’, well in my opinion PERFECT is
over-rated and what the definition would be of a perfect dieter is beyond me
but I’m guessing it would differ from my thoughts.
Weight loss is a very emotive subject isn’t it and everyone
who wants to lose weight has their own reasons and no one has the right to
judge them for those reasons, I have gone through the last two years not really
caring about what I weigh, my weight has maintained more or less at a specific number
and I’ve been okay with that. It has
however risen a little of the last few months thanks to various things and
Christmas and now I’m watching what I eat/drink a little more because I would
like to lose that weight for a number of reasons, one being I feel like I’ve
become stagnant in my life – vicious cycle for me, I’m bored – I eat – I gain
weight – I become inactive – I’m bored – I eat, etc, etc.
I’m not guilt tripping myself, or feeling bad about my body;
my actions or my life and I encourage my members not to feel bad or guilty
too! We are human; we don’t always do
what we planned to do because our emotions and our subconscious guide us in a
different direction. That doesn’t make
us any less of a success, for me success consists of loving what is and taking
care of that – you have to love yourself and your body because you can’t take
care of something that you hate!
You can however want to feed that body good healthy food and
nourish and cherish it. Does that mean
you shouldn’t eat the doughnut that’s passed round the office, does it heck,
you enjoy it and eat is really slowly but make sure you catch that bit of jam
that oozes out before it lands on your nice crisp white blouse ;-). You are allowed to get pleasure from food,
you are allowed to enjoy life and feel like a normal (whatever that is) human
being! I find good healthy food delicious when I can
be bothered to make the effort and cook it!
But for me, I’d be happy with one doughnut, I wouldn’t want
to indulge every day, and trust me when I worked in an office they came round
everyday! Why not? Because I also enjoy walking the dog and getting
in the clothes in my wardrobe in the morning and if I eat too much I gain
weight, if I gain weight my back hurts and my clothes don’t fit – it’s a very
simple equation! I then end up unhappy –
not because I’M OVERWEIGHT but because I’M IN PAIN and I CAN’T GET AROUND! It’s not the fat that’s making me sad, it’s
the fact I can’t live the life I enjoy living.
If you’re overweight and it doesn’t affect you, brilliant – carry on
with your life if you’re happy but let me do something about mine.
For some lucky b******ds (I swear in real life but never
quite like to type it on my blog) out there this eating/enjoying balance comes
naturally, they partake in a bit of what they fancy, then at other times they
forgo the excess. And as just mentioned
for some other lucky b******ds being overweight isn’t an issue, it doesn’t seem
to affect their health or life in anyway.
I AM NOT ONE OF THOSE LUCKY FOLK!
I’m a different kind of LUCKY, I love excess, I enjoy extreme, I’m a
glutton of life – my natural disposition is “I want it all and I want it NOW!” I have however realised over the years that
having that kind of personality leads to me not being in a good place! In the past it has given me health problems
from overeating, it has given me financial problems from overspending, and it’s
also almost lost me my life a few times from falling off the edge of cliffs and
hills and hitting trees after falling off my bike whilst looking for the thrill
of life (& trying to keep up with a handsome marine with a nice bum on the
bike in front)! Luckily I never dabbled
in drugs or who knows what may have happened there! I’m an extreme person who’s spent the last 15
years trying to work out why and what I can do to calm that personality a
little to help me live a happier less dangerous life and I think I’ve managed
to. I’m SO lucky to have realised this because
I know others with a little more extreme version of my personality traits and
it’s led them to a really, really dark place and even death! (overdose,
alcoholism, heart attacks, strokes, accidents!)
So how did I get to where I am now, lots of things got me
here, I read lots, I did workshops, I joined slimming clubs, I listened to
others, I LEARNED!
Weight Watchers taught me lots from the nutritional value of
food to how I could get a happy balance, their cook books even helped teach me
to cook, along with Nigella and Jamie and a whole host of other cook books! It gave me a system to help me gain control
of my intake, I am quite a mathematical person so I liked the numbers and the
fact it’s a bit like a bank account. It
also gave me friendship, some of the best people I know I met through Weight
Watchers, and I now see a lot of them as my extended family. And of course not forgetting it gave me a
purpose, I was going to say job then but I already had one of those, I can and
have earned a much larger salary elsewhere but I’ve never been so satisfied and
fulfilled in my work as I am now at Weight Watchers.
I learned spending doesn’t make you happy for longer than
the few moments you’re spending it – again that came from lots of different
places, thank you to the MoneySavingExpert, and to my mom who was hard up when
we were kids for reminding me we can live on a pittance and be happy.
I learned that doing, doing, doing, going here, doing this,
going there, exploring, visiting, seeing doesn’t make you any happier than
sitting round a table chatting with friends.
A man (can’t remember his name) on a weekend workshop said to me, “It’s
no good keep climbing those mountains Bev, if you never stop to enjoy the view”,
and he was so right, I now often sit and look through my photo albums and
reminisce.
I learned that following your dreams and believing in
yourself and your capabilities is possible – thank you Roy Martin for making me
cry and helping me take that terrifying step from security into ‘who knows’
territory back in July 2004, it paid of
big style.
I learned that guilt sucks and is the most wasted emotion
out there, so I binned it! Who taught me
that, oh so many people, big shout out here to Byron Katie and Louise Hay,
truly inspirational women who have written great books.
I’ve learned that everyone thinks they’re the expert and
they have the answer – actually they don’t! I’m the only expert in me and you’re
the only expert in you, so these days when someone tells me or advises me on
what I should be doing, I smile, say thanks and sieve that information, if there’s
a gem of knowledge in there that works for me I take it, if it’s something that
I’m not feeling or agreeing with – I bin it.
I suggest you do the same (but of course you’re more than welcome to
disagree!)
I hope you got something from reading this because I got a
whole lot from writing it, so with a happy tear in my eye, I’m off to make a
cuppa and give my mom a hug because never forget she’s the reason I’m here at
all.
Happy days all. xx
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